The Gift of our Lack of Ability
I was actually going to post this thought with a picture today but I just can’t bring myself to do it…
I got so frustrated today trying to take a picture of one of the most beautiful sunsets I’ve seen in quite a while. Nothing I tried to do with my camera would do it anything close to justice. It was so irritating to me! I wanted to share this with everyone and the picture I did end up posting was so lame compared to what the real masterpiece looked like in front of me. Now here’s the thing, if I would have only seen the picture and not the real thing I would have thought it was incredible, and I wouldn’t have really thought that there was too much more to it.
Sometimes I feel this way about God. Or what God can do. I have all of these incredible pictures of dreams in my heart, but a lot of days things seem to be more work then fun, more heartache than rejoicing or more gray than pink. I tend to settle for the picture version of life because I can’t see the rest of it. No one can show me the real beauty except for God, like that sunset tonight that I couldn’t share with anyone else…they would have had to see it for themselves tonight. But the tricky part is that I have to train myself to recognize what God’s showing me because He does it in a different way than the world, as well meaning as it and the people in it can be sometimes, can ever show me.
On the other hand I can also get frustrated on the opposite end of things when I’m trying to get someone to see the incredible beauty and excitement that God has for them in their lives. When someone can’t see their worth, when someone won’t get rid of poisonous sin or guilt or regret or un-forgiveness in their life it breaks my heart. But I try and take on the role of savior in their lives rather than fully giving them up to God, therefore holding myself back at the same time by not fully trusting that God has the only tools it takes to paint the canvas of all of our lives.
My friend Liz read me the coolest quote last night that she had re-tweeted from a pastor (I’m super retarded with twitter so I didn’t see it, she’s chosen to face her fears and tackle twitter and now I think I’m going to have to make a new effort). It brought goosebumps to the back of my neck. The quote said, “What to a child seems an impossibility is quite easy to his father, so even our greatest difficulties are simple to God.” (tweeted by John Burke). The way this put it in terms of a child and an adult really made sense to me for this concept that seems to be repeated over and over. The kids in my life think things I can do without a second though are completely impossible and entirely too hard for them to ever do…it really made something click.
It wasn’t when I was standing in awe of God’s creation in that sunset tonight, but rather afterwards when I was trying to share it with others that I was struck with how much BIGGER my God is than I ever give Him credit for. I think I have the capability of re-creating His masterpiece in my own life or in others? No way, I can’t even come close! How much time do I waste trying to be God of my own life, and especially trying to be God in others lives! Lord forgive me for trying to plagiarize Your creativity and masterpiece and then for getting frustrated with you for not showing up like I know You’re capable of.
May I remember from this PINK sunset, (it really was a glorious pink), to always, always ALWAYS simply point people towards your creation instead of trying to re-create it on my own. Instead of showing pictures, may I tilt their chin towards the heavens so they get the FULL picture that only You can show.